Is it possible to rekindle a marriage

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Just ask your coach! Chat with your relationship coach today. The secret to how to rekindle a marriage? End it. Then start over--with the same person! Take the Power of Two Relationship Quiz. Begin the Relationship Quiz. Learn more Sign up. Try our free relationship quiz. Hello, I'm Dr. This free relationship quiz will give you a better sense of how we can help you. Click here to get started.

Or click here to sign up. Talk with your relationship coach today. Has your relationship fizzled or has the fire died down? Many couples become more friends than lovers over time, and many of them accept this as normal. You could also be spending too much time at work or with your friends and have drifted away from your significant other.

Life changes can also be difficult to navigate for many couples. Love is a powerful emotion. It takes commitment, but you can rekindle a relationship. What matters is that it is possible. Over time, taking the following small steps in your relationship can lead to massive changes and help you bring back the spark.

Having things in common with your partner is wonderful, but opposites also attract. This principle is called the law of polarity. Think back to when you first met your significant other. Things were easy between the two of you, and the physical chemistry proved your instant attraction.

When you rekindle a relationship, remember that ease and chemistry. Nurture your own natural energy and confidence; your partner was and is attracted to you in your natural state. When working together in a natural, balanced way, neither of you need to suppress your true self, and you can be happy together as you are.

This is especially true when sex is a contentious issue in the relationship. If you find yourself being less physical with your partner to punish them or are avoiding sex for any reason, you need to address that immediately. Fixing a relationship is nearly impossible when one or both of you are not able to show physical affection.

Remember to touch your partner frequently as this will help you to redevelop closeness and intimacy. Of course, sex is also very important in a relationship and understanding your own sexual energy — as well as that of your partner — is key to learning how to rekindle a broken relationship. If sexual intimacy is becoming less and less frequent, you need to take action now before it becomes an insurmountable problem.

When you started dating your partner, you were intensely curious about them. It creates an open, nonjudgmental environment for productive dialogue. Novelty is key here, so it's important that you and your partner continue to seek new shared experiences , whether low-key trying a new restaurant or something more adventurous traveling to a foreign country.

According to a New York Times article, new experiences activate the brain's reward system , flooding the brain with dopamine and norepinephrine—the same chemicals responsible for those euphoric highs of early romance. A simple way to revive those emotions and stimulate the happy chemical production is to find ways of demonstrating you care. The best part is that it doesn't have to mean a grand gesture.

If you see something that reminds you of your partner, take a picture and send it to them," LeClair suggests.

Chances are your partner will feel the same. This might seem like a no-brainer, but physical intimacy can be difficult to maintain as time passes, and home and work demands take over.

Sadly, routine is rarely the spice of life—or of a love life for that matter. According to a Johns Hopkins School of Medicine blog post , the dreaded sex slump occurs around a relationship's three- or four-year mark. That said, it's important to be intentiona l with each other throughout your relationship.

One way to do this is to lean into rather than ignoring or turning away from what relationship researchers at The Gottman Institute describe as "bids for connection. In short, maintaining a sense of openness and curiosity is essential to sustaining mutual satisfaction within a long-term relationship.

Even long-term couples have much to learn about each other when they are mindful, rather than distracted or passive, listeners. That means putting down the smartphone or turning off the TV during conversation or suspending the urge to judge or come up with a solution to your partner's concerns remember openness and curiosity are key!

Instead, strive to focus on their experience—listen to what they're saying as much as how they're saying it and why. Being fully present takes you out of automatic mode and allows the other person to be fully seen. This naturally heightens desire," says Sharma.

You'll quickly noticed that full immersion in your shared experiences with your partner, rather than just a distracted presence, will elevate each moment in ways you may have not thought possible—breathing new life and spectrum of possibility to even the most mundane tasks. Appreciating your partner for who they are as well as what they do like take out the trash because they know you hate doing it creates a positive feedback loop that encourages couples to maintain the relationship. Offer to give your partner a back or shoulder rub.

People associate foreplay with sexual intercourse, but affectionate touch is a powerful way to demonstrate and rekindle passion even if you are not a touchy-feely person. Share your innermost wishes, fantasies, and desires with your partner. Experiment with new ways to bring pleasure to each other. Look at sex as an opportunity to get to know your partner better over time. Have gentle, loving-tender, intimate, and highly erotic sex.

Break up the routine and try new things as sexual needs change. Set the mood for intimacy before TV or work dulls your passion. A light meal along with your favorite music and wine can set the stage for great sex. The good news is that allowing your partner to influence you can reignite the spark you once enjoyed. In fact, Dr. Gottman reminds us that friendship is the glue that can hold a marriage together:.

Even if you are not a touchy-feely person, increasing physical affection and emotional attunement can help you to sustain a deep, meaningful bond. Learn how to make your relationship work in the first Gottman Relationship Coach program. For more ideas on how to rekindle the passion in your relationship, subscribe to The Gottman Relationship Blog below:.